5 September 2011

Can You See Me?

Some days I think I must be invisible.

Can you see me waiting with my heavy trolley? I'm the one with two small children who lets everyone else pass before I try to make my way through the crowded aisle. Then, as I heave the trolley forward, you step in front of me. I have to change direction to go round you. You have a single loaf of bread.

Can you see me putting my shopping on the conveyor belt? Bend, grab, stand, twist, drop, twist, repeat. Why are you piling on your carrots and your Cilit Bang and your mince? I've still got half a trolley load to go on. It will never fit into the six inches of space you have left me. I ask you to please wait. You look incredulous. Where did that small voice come from?

Can you see me here in this busy car park. We're both trying to get our children into our cars. You open your door as far as it will go. I can only open mine a notch. You don't hurry. As I finally begin to reverse out, you start to get in your car. I have to stop and wait for you, again. I make a mess of reversing and have to go forwards and back. You have your car in reverse. I worry you'll pull out. You clearly haven't seen me.

Can you see me pulling in here, waiting behind this parked car? I'm following the rules of the road and giving way to the oncoming traffic. You overtake me and make the oncoming car wait. I guess we're both invisible.

Can you see me queuing for the cash machine? I'm standing a respectful distance from the woman in front. When she leaves I step forward, but you have walked in front of me. As if I am not there.

The funny thing is, I'm not little. I certainly don't disappear when I turn sideways. I have a fuller figure. I'm a plus size. So why can't you see me? Is it because I'm not attractive? Is it because I'm just a mum?

Most people walk around in their own self-centered little bubbles. They drive like there's no one else on the road. They have no manners. They only care about themselves and this makes me very sad.

I'm bringing my boys up to be caring, kind, polite and considerate. Will I make them invisible too?



  1. some people are just so oblivious to others and stuck in their own little world its crazy. It's happened to me before and working in a supermarket i've noticed that people are getting ruder and less interested in others.

    You're not invisable sweetie you are fabulous and those who can't see you are the ones who are invisible to life xxx

  2. Did you get my DM on Twitter? I saw you, and only you, straight away, looking at me on Susanna's (a Modern Mother) profile page. Your happy face stood out amidst a sea of others x

  3. Sadly unless people like us start to call them out the rude people keep getting away with it. Ditch the small voice and make yourself heard. Do it with humour and good grace and you might be surprised at the response. I tend to grin broadly and look them straight in the eye - that and the fact I'm a size 22 makes me pretty difficult to ignore... ;-)

  4. Oh Sandy! I feel the same as you! What is going on in this world today?

    I would like to think that as more and more of us raise our children to be polite and respectful; to think of others before ourselves, that maybe....just maybe things will reverse itself in the future.

    Here's hoping, anyway.

  5. Politeness and self-confidence aren't necessarily mutually exclusive!

  6. This is a wonderful post, I too often feel invisable, currently at the school gates

  7. I hear you! Mums and prams somehow turn invisible even though we're double the load as other street / queue travellers! I can't count the amount of times I've had people push in front of me in lines thinking I wasn't lining up as I have a pram! Or step right in front of the pram as you're walking by... hmmm it makes me mad, but I think it's trying to teach me the biggest parenting lesson of patience...

  8. Amy, aww, thank you. You're right about people being invisible to life x

    Suze, I didn't see it at the time, but thank you x

    Anon, yes! Humour and good grace are definitely the way to go. I'll work on the small voice too! :-)

    Gigi, I hope there are enough of us trying to reverse the trend x

    TomFAB, I've been thinking about your comment a lot. You're right, of course. I guess I need to work on the self-confidence!

  9. The Mad House, I'm sorry you're feeling it too x

    Rochelle, I'm still trying to learn that lesson!! :-)


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