I did a lot of bargaining yesterday with a God I don't believe in.
As I drove two year old Cash to hospital with suspected H1N1 Swine Flu I was prepared to give anything and everything for my baby to be well.
It sounds a little over-dramatic now, as he is much improved, but my thoughts were tortured with images of watching him struggle to breath. I watched my brother's lungs stop working and I watched my Dad's heart fail. I was not going to watch my baby die.
As an asthmatic myself I know the discomfort and terror of not being able to breathe. Cash was having difficulty breathing yesterday. His burning body, rapid rasping breaths, heaving diaphragm and lethargic whimpers were enough for me to brave the GP's receptionist and demand an emergency appointment.
The GP said the words I'd feared, that we had to go straight to hospital. I'd already put a change of clothes, water and a muslin in my bag for Cash, just in case. My first trip out after almost two weeks of being snowed in and we're off to the pediatric assessment unit.
Then my brain clearly demonstrated that my migraines are stress related. Great timing brain. I had to ignore my symptoms and concentrate on my little boy.
I willed my darling Cash to get well. I had a lot of time to do this. I spent hours perched on hospital chairs cradling him. These hellish hours were punctuated by nurses treating him with paracetomol, ibuprofen and ventolin. He eventually relaxed, his temperature fell from 39 to 37 degrees and his breathing improved.
Cash's request of 'I want to go home' finally paid off. Armed with antibiotics, tamiflu and ventolin and instructions to stay away from the 'at risk', we came home.
He's not out of the woods yet, but he's been playing this morning and asking for food - so different to yesterday. I have the mother-in-law of all headaches and a fistful of new grey hairs, but my boy is home.
We had a lovely Christmas Day, but since then have been nursing poorly children. Not quite as festive as I'd hoped, our main aim now is avoiding hospital. Roll on 2011.
.
Poor Cash and poor you! Sending lots of love and hugs x
ReplyDeleteOh how scary :(
ReplyDeletePoor little man (and poor mummy!) - fingers crossed he's all better super quickly & it's all a distant memory very soon.
Take care & big hugs xxx
This is a truely nightmare scenario, i've been there I know what you have been through. I cant find the words to say something meaningful other than take it easy yourself and get well soon Cash! xx
ReplyDeleteOh sweetheart, we had that the first time round and I was petrified for Littlest cos his lungs too. Glad to hear Cash is better x
ReplyDeleteHow shockingly grim for you. Good luck with the recuperation. It's been such an ill Christmas. We had an emergency dr in the middle of the night (didn't know they even existed) because toddler's temp was stuck at 40C for hours.... Hope the start to 2011 is better....
ReplyDeletePoor you, so glad he is home now Sandy. Lots of Love and Hugs x
ReplyDeleteHow terrifying, so glad he's better today.
ReplyDeleteOh, poor baby. I'm glad he's showing improvement, and that he's home with you. Take care Sandy, thinking of you all x
ReplyDeleteWhen we had Swine Flu last year it was terrible, if you need anything just ask.
ReplyDeleteHope Cash is feeling better now :)
ReplyDeleteSo sorry to read this, very scary. Glad to hear he's doing better today x
ReplyDeleteOh you poor things. We had it last year and it is really horrible. Take care, and much love. x
ReplyDeleteWhat a nightmare! Hope your little one is well on the road to recovery and that you have a happy healthy 2011.
ReplyDeleteHow frightening. I hope Cash is better soon x
ReplyDeleteWe have a suspect case of the swine flu here but no-one is interested in "helping" - we've been told to dose up on paracetamol and cold/flu drinks!
I hope he's much, much better soon
ReplyDeletekim x
So scary. Thank goodness all seems to be on the mend now. Big hugs to the brave boy all round.
ReplyDeleteHere's to a healthier start to 2011. x
Gosh that sounds awful and scary. Glad to hear that Cash is feeling better today! You take care xx
ReplyDeleteHow absolutely dreadful Sandy. Hope you're all recovering well from the ordeal. Hugs to Cash. xx
ReplyDeleteOh god I hate that feeling of pure panic as you have to take your little one to hospital. So glad he's ok now.
ReplyDeleteGet well soon Cash. What a frightening experience. Big Hugs x
ReplyDeleteI am so sorry , poor Cash and i hope he is on the road to recovery now.
ReplyDeleteAs someone who has been there i know how scary it was , we ignored it for far to long when my eldest developed breathing problems a few weeks after throat surgery and we almost lost her . In the end only us forcing the hospital to admit her (again) saved her life and you can never be to careful .
Your line about praying to a god you don't beleive in really hit home, i prayed so hard those few weeks my daughter was in hospital to a god i don't beleive in but sometimes you just have to do something...
Send love and hugs to you all
Oh no poor thing. Hope he gets better really really soon. Sending lots of love and hugs x x x
ReplyDeleteWow, I'm rather overwhelmed by all your comments. It's lovely to know that people care.
ReplyDeleteCash has been a lot better today. He's been more up than down, although we've had a couple of breathing scares. Thank you, Ventolin.
I was up at 6 today making sure our bags were packed just in case we had to go back to hospital. Thankfully they weren't required.
I'm still on tenterhooks, listening to him breathing from his bedroom door.
I'll keep you updated.
Thanks again,
Sandy xxx
I'm glad Cash is doing better! How scary that must have been for you. I hope he is back to his usual self very soon. All the best for the New Year x
ReplyDeleteWhat an awful thing to happen! So glad he's better. I hate those trips too.
ReplyDeleteMerry Christmas to you all!
How heart stopping, I am so glad he has improved. Sending you all hugs and hoping that there is nothing more to worry about xx
ReplyDeletePoor little love. Hope he bounces back fast. Best wishes for a great new year.
ReplyDeleteOh no, I too know the feeling of bargaining. I am so glad that Cash is on the mend, sending you my love
ReplyDeleteOh bless, I am sure he will be fine now he's over the worst of it.
ReplyDeleteWhen my little miss was 10 weeks old she developed bronchiolitis and I rang NHS Direct and was told to take her straight to hospital, but to make sure I obeyed the rules of the road! Like my driving was the top thing on my mind.
Much love x
I am so glad that Cash is on the mend and how awful for you all xx
ReplyDeleteThank you all for your get well wishes. They have worked, Cash is much improved today.
ReplyDeleteSandy x
Oh Sorry Sandy I missed this....so glad he's starting to feel better but how awful and a terrible fright for you. I hope the rest of you stay well and that you manage to have an okay evening tonight. Take care.
ReplyDeleteBest wishes for 2011. XX
There is nothing as scary as a sick baby. I'm glad to hear he is better.
ReplyDeleteI hope he's getting better - been thinking of you and hoping that you are all ok (and sending our love) xxx
ReplyDeleteThat sounds terrifying! So glad he is feeling better. I grew up with asthma and that feeling of not being able to breathe is scary. Sounds like you were a calming, take-charge presence for Cash.
ReplyDeleteThank you all, Cash is so much better now. It's amazing how quickly they bounce back.
ReplyDeleteSandy x
Oh my gosh how scary. Glad he is well on the mend now and hope you're over the trauma xx
ReplyDeleteThank you, he is sooo much better now! :-)
ReplyDeletePositive mental attitude, when the chips are down, it's all there is. So brave, I nearly lost my step-son 18months ago to meningitis with bacterial infection, and positive energy saved his life along with the brillant medical staff in Lanzarote, and Gran Canaria. Try and relax a little to save some energy for yourself. The stress on your body takes its toll. Sounds like he's taken a giant leap forward. Hoping for leaps and bounds of improvement in the coming days.
ReplyDeleteThank you, Fiona. You must have been out of your mind with worry. Yes, the power of positive thought or prayer does help. You're right, I need to concentrate on getting my energy back too x
ReplyDeleteAs a mother of 3 asthmatics, one of which was hopitalised aged 3 for 4 nights with it - and as a migraine suffer myself (also stress {and excitement?!) related, I can totally relate to this post. It is terrifying. Nothing worse. Sending you good thoughts and hope all on road to recovery. x
ReplyDeleteKate, thank you very much. We are now all fully recovered. That must have been so frightening for you. We may have to consider asthma if the breathing problems happen the next time they get ill. We'll cross that bridge when we come to it x
ReplyDelete