Shall We Have Another Baby?

I'm broody.

I saw a tiny baby at the library this morning, I just wanted to scoop him up, cradle him in my arms and gently rock him. I wanted to nuzzle his soft head and inhale his baby aroma. I wanted to take him home!

Before I had children I didn't pay much attention to them. If a colleague came into the office on maternity leave I would coo politely, but make my excuses when I was offered a hold. Until I had Presley I'd never really held a baby (well, only if a parent placed their offspring into my arms and then took it away again when it cried)!

Now I only have to look at my Anne Geddes calendar and I sigh with longing. Not a day goes by when I don't think about being pregnant again. The delightful fluttering of the first kicks, the awe you feel when you realise there's a little person in your belly, the sheer effort of giving birth, the miracle of life.

I know, pregnancy is not all flouncing around in meadows in floaty maternity dresses, making daisy chains and reading name books... but the wind, spots, stretchmarks, indigestion, cramp, nausea, gestational diabetes, worry, sleeplessness and tiredness of pregnancy are a small price to pay for the end result, a gorgeous new child.

We always said we would have three children, if we were able. That's why we had our first two so close together, so we could squeeze another in before I get too old.

I'll be *whispers* forty in February. The risks of pregnancy increase with age. We have two beautiful healthy boys, perhaps we should quit while we're ahead.

If we do stop at two children I wonder if I will always feel this longing? The desire to have another baby is so strong, it's almost a physical yearning.

In practical terms the move from two to three children would mean changing our car and losing our spare bedroom. It would also be pretty tiring. I'll admit I'm exhausted running around after Presley and Cash. Pregnancy and a new baby would make this even harder. I've only got two hands and two knees. If I became pregnant now I would have three under three, for a little while at least. How would I cope?

I know I have infinite love to give a new baby, but my time is limited. I feel like I'm already struggling to give Presley and Cash enough individual attention, so how will us having another baby affect them?

Perhaps I should just concentrate on the children I have and enjoy them.

Perhaps I should fold up all the tiny baby clothes and take them to the charity shop.

No, not just yet.

Shall We Have Another Baby?

GOSH

I'll admit here and now that I don't watch the X-Factor, but when the brilliant Brit in Bosnia asked me if I would promote the X-Factor charity single on Baby Baby I didn't think twice.

There is a very good reason for this. My brother spent a great deal of time at GOSH, pretty much from birth, until he was sixteen. I haven't written about him before because it is difficult. Losing a sibling is one of the worst things that can happen to you. When your brother dies and you are 27 and he is 25 you lose a part of you, a part of your family history. You lose a friend.

GOSH looked after Peter so well. He was terribly ill with a rare lung condition. Several times my parents were told that he would not survive the night, but he did. Thanks to his amazing spirit and thanks to the caring and highly skilled doctors and nurses that looked after him.

I'm sorry, I can't write any more.

Here is all the information you need to support the GOSH/X-Factor charity single:

You may be aware that the X Factor has released a charity single and Sony are going to donate all profits to Great Ormond St. hospital. The single was released earlier this week and they are really hoping that it will hit the No. 1 spot at the weekend. Not only do they need the money but they are hoping that the publicity that a No. 1 single will have will highlight Great Ormond St and their need to continue raising money.

All 12 of this year’s X Factor finalists have released a fantastic cover of Michael Jackson’s You Are Not Alone in aid of Great Ormond Street Hospital Children’s Charity.

Their website is http://www.gosh.org/x-factor/the-charity-single/ and there is a little video that goes with it that was shown on last weeks show http://www.gosh.org/x-factor/the-charity-single/the-story-so-far/oscar/.

Thousands of children just like Oscar, who really is an inspiration to us all, need the help of the amazing staff at GOSH and this single will help sick children from across the UK to get better.

Some of the patients of Great Ormond Street Hospital appear in the official music video launched with the single on Sunday night http://xfactor.itv.com/2009/videos/player/item_200784.htm and if you watch this then I am sure you won’t fail to want to support them.

They are asking for everyone’s support in helping this single make the number one spot this weekend. Sony are donating all profits from the sale of the single and a number of retailers are also very kindly donating all their profits from the sale of the single (find out which ones by clicking here http://www.gosh.org/x-factor/the-charity-single/buy/ ). Please ask everyone you know to buy/download this single now – it doesn’t cost much but every single bought will make an incredible difference to the sickest children in the UK right now.

Thank you.

GOSH

Rules for a Perfect Family Christmas

When John Lewis asked me to write my 'rules' for a perfect family Christmas I was delighted.

I love John Lewis, it's my favourite shop (and I'm not just saying that because they're sending me a voucher)!

For all of my adult life I have shopped at John Lewis. I used to go to the Milton Keynes store for my Christmas shopping. When I worked near the Welwyn Garden City store I would go there in my lunch hour. The only item on our wedding list was John Lewis vouchers. For the record we mainly bought white goods. I bought all my baby things from the Kingston store when we lived in Surrey. Now we have moved to Preston and I've started the big countdown. John Lewis Preston opens in 2012! Until then I shop online, a lot. It's free delivery on everything too.

So, the rules...

Children

The children must stay in their bedrooms until Mummy and Daddy get the video camera running downstairs to record the wide-eyed Santa sack reaction.

There will be at least one potato in each child's Santa sack. Each potato represents a toy that Santa took out of their sack when they were naughty.

Each child must share their chocolate with Mummy and Daddy.

The Christmas Meal

We will all remember our table manners as we enjoy a long, leisurely lunch.

We will eat a roast dinner, with all the trimmings. There must be a sprout on every plate for decoration. Mummy will eat the seventeen remaining sprouts. Yum.

Mummy and Daddy will drink champagne and eat Rennies for the rest of the day.

The In-Laws

We will all go to the In-Laws for Boxing Day. Mummy and Daddy can relax and eat an enormous meal that they didn't have to cook, The children can eat as much chocolate as they like and play with Grandma and Grandad.

Entertainment

We will slouch on the couch, still wearing our paper hats, and watch a family film. The film will have been highlighted in our copy of the Christmas Radio Times.

Decorations

Mummy will decorate the tree with a lifetime of Christmases. Each decoration tells a story. There is the koala fairy from Australia, the wooden kiwi from New Zealand, the candy canes that she bought from Poundstretcher twenty years ago that the cats used to hide down the back of the sofa. There is the enamelled penguin and the gold dragonfly that we bought for Presley's first Christmas and the knitted owl and charity teddy we bought for Cash's first Christmas.

I love Christmas!

This is a sponsored post.

Rules for a Perfect Family Christmas

Wordless Wednesday - Children In Need

Baby Baby supports BBC Children in Need.

This year's appeal is on BBC1 on Friday 20th November.

Wordless Wednesday - Children In Need

A Tour of the Breastfeeding Unit

When I was 36 weeks pregnant with my second child we were booked on a tour of the maternity unit at our local hospital. I wasn't sure it was worth going as I'd imagined all hospitals were the same clinical, impersonal, yet dirty places.

As we had recently moved to the area we decided to go on the tour, just to get our bearings.

There was plenty of car-parking and reasonably priced too! There were bays near the entrance for mums in labour. After a short walk we entered the maternity unit. It was light and airy. It didn't smell like a hospital. It was clean without smelling of disinfectant.

We were greeted by a cheery midwife named Sue . She welcomed us all (there were five couples on the tour) and told us to ask as many questions as we liked.

We saw the wards first. They were bright and spotlessly clean. Midwives chatted with new mums and cooed over newborn babies.

We heard a loud moan and saw a woman in labour being pushed by in a wheelchair. 'She's on her way to the delivery suite', said Sue, 'that's where we're going next'.

The delivery suite was a picture of calm efficiency. There were many delivery rooms. Each room had a large birthing pool, mats on the floor, bean bags and birthing balls. Sue showed us how to dim the lights. She also mentioned that all essential medical equipment was at hand, but not in full view. The room was cosy and private.

'Follow me', said Sue, 'we're very proud of the next unit'. We approached a new wing called The Breastfeeding Unit. It was next to the maternity ward. I hadn't seen one of these before.

In The Breastfeeding Unit were several large rooms. In each room were a few breastfeeding chairs and stools. There were pillows of all shapes and sizes. There was also a bed.

Sue explained to us that new mothers could come here, away from the ward, and learn to breastfeed. There were five full time, fully trained, breastfeeding specialists working on the unit. Sue had arranged for us to see a breastfeeding specialist in action. She was helping a new mum to feed her newborn son. The new mum was happy for us to watch.

The breastfeeding specialist, Kath, explained that the most important part of learning to breastfeed was for the mother and baby to feel relaxed and comfortable. Kath helped the new mum get comfortable. She laid a pillow on her lap and handed her the baby. We could see the baby was hungry so Kath explained exactly how to attach the baby to the breast. This took a few attempts, but each time Kath patiently advised the new mum what she should do next. Once the baby was feeding well, Kath passed the new mum a glass of water.

This was a revelation to me. Kath didn't grab the new mum's breast or force open the baby's mouth and shove the two together (as had been my experience of being 'taught' how to breastfeed).

Kath said that the mums could spend as long as they liked in the unit. It was manned around the clock and a breastfeeding specialist was always available to help, with every feed if necessary.

'What happens when you go home?', I asked. Sue took over again and led us to another part of the unit. 'Here's the day clinic', she said, 'you can come back - every day if you need to - for as long as you like. You never have to wait long, there are always plenty of staff.'.

'We're so proud of our breastfeeding rates, they're more than double the national average'. Sue was beaming. I started to cry, for joy. This time I would get the help I needed.

***

So, where is this wonderful hospital?

I'm sorry to disappoint you. It doesn't exist. I made it up.

But wouldn't it be BRILLIANT?!

This post was written for the Sleep is for the weak writing workshop #5.

The prompt I chose was 3. What would you like to see in your ideal hospital?

A Tour of the Breastfeeding Unit